Today had been a tough day. There had been yelling, there had been chaos, there had been lots of crying and now, as the day was coming to an end, Adam was trailing behind Crowley, low energy crying. He was over-tired, his feet hurt and Crowley had yelled at store and scared Adam.
It was starting to get dark, the rain was drizzling and Adam sniffled pathetically as they walked towards the car.
Then, inexplicably, Adam stopped. And, of course, then Crowley did too but Adam was just standing there, still. Despite his uncles insistence that he had to move quickly because of the weather. "I have to pee." Suddenly, urgently. With big, red eyes, he sniffled and held his crotch very obviously. "I gotta pee now!"
"...we are almost home, Adam. Just a quick ride in the car." Fuck. He was determined for Adam not to pee in his car, yet he just knew that that was what would happen if he let him into the car right now. It was the most precious thing he owned - granted, it still wasn't worth a lot, but still. His car was cool. Nothing special, but sleek and black and everyone always loved it.
It was bad enough that there was a children's seat in the back now. But pee? No. "Fine. Fine, we'll find you somewhere you can pee."
Crowley sighed as he looked around, frowning. "There's the library, we can go there. Just give me a moment, I'll get our stuff in the car."
He unlocked the car, put the bags in the trunk, and then checked to see whether Adam had peed himself yet. Not yet, small mercies. "Come on, Adam. It's just over there."
He reached for Adam's hand and pulled him along, the rain getting heavier by the second.
"I need to pee sooooo bad." Adam whined as he hurried after his uncle, hand still on his crotch, hurrying towards the library. As the big doors opened, Adam winced at the light and sniffled away, using his sleeve to wipe his nose very elegantly.
"Oh, I'm terribly sorry, we're closed. It's 18.01." Aziraphale called out from where he was stacking the returned, ready to happily get into a discussion about time keeping when he turned to see a very wet (and ridiculously handsome - like insanely handsome) man and his -- his son? The boy was squirming very insistently.
"I gotta pee, mister!"
"Oh. Oooh." Ah. Well. Maybe the lecture of time keeping could wait. "The bathroom is on the left, the lights are automatic."
"Thanks." Crowley's reply came out quite curt, but he knew this was a matter of seconds. He bent down to scoop Adam up with one arm and make his way over to the bathroom in big strides. The lights in here were bright enough to hurt his eyes, even with his glasses on, but whatever. It was dry and Adam hadn't peed himself yet.
He set the boy down, bent down to help him with his pants and then simply sat him on the toilet, because they had no time to waste here. "Now pee like a champion, kid."
After all the stress he'd caused them. "If that librarian yells at me after, you better look cute for me. Librarians are scary. The one at my school almost bit my nose off."
Adam peed very happily, legs swinging back and forth, looking very content as he did. "They almost bit your nose off? Why? Do all librarians do that?" Was he in danger of losing his nose today. He didn't like that. No, he rather liked his nose. He could smell things with it and it felt funny when he touched it. Like now. Sitting on the toilet, peeing and poking his nose.
When he was finally done, he hopped off the toilet and pulled his undies back up, walking over to the sink and frowning.
"I can't reach, can you help?" Crowley said he had to alwaaaaays wash his hands.
"Uh-huh. Think you're reaching the limit of books we can carry. Might even be reaching the limit of what we can fit in the car." Adam had started listing all the books he wanted to borrow from the library. It had started somewhat reasonably, but now he was just listing any odd combination of words that came to mind. Crowley walked up the stairs with him, holding his hand. "I don't think there is a book on why cars go whoosh, but we can try."
He'd never found books all that exciting, which he supposed made sense. His eyes weren't made for reading, the strain got to him quickly. Also, reading was for nerds. "Remember to pick a book to show Bill too, he's coming over later."
That said he let go of Adam's hand, giving him a gentle push. "There, you can go over to the train again. Full of books."
Some other kids there, but Crowley wasn't worried about that. Adam was good with other kids. Scarily good, at times, they all seemed to follow his lead entirely too readily.
He glanced around for that shock of light blond curls, wondering whether Aziraphale would be around. He kind of wanted to see him again, because he really wanted to know his deal. Even more so now that he knew where he lived and what that might entail.
Crowley was dressed similarly to last time, although he was wearing a black button up shirt this time, with the top few buttons unbuttoned because he wasn't a square. He noticed some glances he was getting and ignored them. he knew he didn't fit in here, nice library during daytime hours, all black and wearing sunglasses. He simply stood there, arms crossed loosely, daring anyone to take offense. He doubted he'd be getting any grief over it and, hey, his boy was happy to be here.
Oh God, it was him again. He really did come back. He had expected him too, yes, but he had been so worked up over it that he had been jumping in and out of his office, both excited and terrified, not sure how to handle any of it. And then he saw him. Tall, dark and handsome. He hadn't stopped thinking about him. The beautiful red hair, the honey golden eyes, the wet torso... that one moment his hips gyrated. Yeah, Crowley had been on his mind all weekend and most of the morning.
And now, here he was. Somehow looking way hotter. Unbuttoned top buttons like that?! A crime! Mortifying. Utterly, truly unfair.
He looked at him and nearly audibly whimpered. What was wrong with him?
And, of course, as he looked at him, Crowley turned and their eyes met. And now he couldn't back off, he couldn't pretend he hadn't seen him or play it cool. So what did he do? With no element of cool, he lifted his hand and waved rather dorkily. "Hello!"
"Hey." Very cool, like someone who had spent the majority of his teen years practising the art of cool, Crowley just gave a slight nod, smiling barely, but visibly. He held out the books about tigers having tea. "I've got a return and a complaint."
Sauntering over to the counter, he leaned on it with one hand, looking at Aziraphale closer up. "You didn't give me a warning. I had to read this to him approximately six-hundred sixty-six times. I can now recite it from memory. I see it flash before my eyes in my sleep. My life is nothing but this book. And he wants to keep on reading it."
Crowley propped his chin up on his palm, sighing as he looked at Aziraphale. "Is this torture? Have you concocted this because you like to see me suffer? What kind of sadist are you? Honestly, angel, if there is anything I can give up to stop the torment, I would! Any secret. Any favours. It's all yours. Make him stop wanting to read that damn book and I'm eternally yours."
He had thought the complaint was real. He had assumed it was for bad conduct or a damaged book or maybe to ask for petrol money but no, it was playful. It was silly. This was 'banter', as it were, and he was able to slow his rapidly beating heart enough to relax a little, smiling somewhat awkwardly. "Yes, well, children do love to hear the same story again and again. The only cure to such an infliction is find another one he would be addicted to. I could recommend you a few, if you'd like, but I'm sure he'll find something today."
He turned and there was young Adam, playing with the children on the train, organising some sort of game.
Aziraphale swallowed down any remaining anxiety and smiled at Crowley. Do not look at his sexy chest, Aziraphale. Do not. That chest is the gateway to hell. "I think he would love Funny Bones."
All the returns were put away and Aziraphale was just sorting the shelves a little, well aware that his shift had ended but he didn't really want to leave. He didn't want to go home, honestly, not after all of that but what did he even do about what happened back there? It was insane! It was fantasy. It seemed almost fictional but it did indeed happen.
He heard Anathema pushing the cart back over and then suddenly, he remembered he wasn't alone in the world and was likely holding his colleague up. That was a big oops on his end.
"You can go on ahead, I will lock up!" Aziraphale called from where he was arranging the true crime books, idly wondering which one Barty would want. "Don't let me keep you, I still have things to do."
"Obviously I will not. We're finally alone." Anathema came over the rest of the way, letting go of the cart and walking up to Aziraphale, so he'd have no chance to escape. Escape the conversation, that was, obviously she had no plans of hurting him in any way. Unless he really didn't tell her anything. "I've been holding back so long now, just because people kept butting in."
This job would be much better if it wasn't for customers. Alas. "Who was that?! The sexy guy with the tight pants. Redhead. He only had eyes for you."
"Oh. Oh, no, you must not assume." Anathema got so scary when she came at him like that and Aziraphale was aware that he was hiding behind the crime shelf, tentatively peering at his colleague with uncertainty and concern. "We are-- you really can't call a customer sexy, by the way -- but we are just ... I wouldn't say friends."
What was she implying? Only had eyes for him. Well... today, maybe.. Only eyes for him. And Bill. Whoever the damn hell Bill was.
"His name is Crowley and we met last Friday when his son desperately had to use the facilities. I let him get a book and the rest is history."
"History, yes. But are we talking the history of Oscar Wilde here or..." Because that had been a lot of tension. "Also, when I can tell a guy's size from the way he walks, I get to call him sexy. Clearly he's asking for it, there's no other reason for pants like that."
Seemed pretty obvious to her. Softening her approach, she smiled at Aziraphale, taking a step closer. "Do you like him? Did you go out? He calls you angel, doesn't he? That's nice."
"Look at that, a message from Felix." Crowley snorted as he glanced at his phone, before tossing it down onto the sofa next to him. "Now I get to decide whether I should chat some or if I turn him off right away by mentioning the hell spawn."
Said hell spawn was currently being on his best behaviour, actually, because it was just after time and before bedtime and he was allowed to watch cartoons for a bit. Then he'd be tucked into bed by Bill, which was apparently the best thing ever. Luckily Adam slept early, meant that Bill still had time to go out afterwards. And Crowley could mourn his wasted youth or perhaps something a tad more entertaining.
Looking at Bill, he leaned back on the sofa, deciding it was time to catch up. After all, so far their afternoon had mostly consisted of Bill entertaining Adam while Crowley got to nap on the couch. "You still seeing... whatever his name was. That wanker."
"Felix texted me today to ask if I could get you to come party and I said nah, I'll go visit him and his kid though and he totally just ghosted me after that. It ain't you, it's just his issues." Felix even liked kids, that was what made it so stupid. He just hated losing friends in such a way and acted out.
Bill yawned and looked over one of Adam's Peppa Pig books, just curious more than anything.
"That wanker, that's the name you picked? Christ, that's mild. Usually it's worse." Bill huffed out a laugh and flipped through the pages. "Kinda. I mean, no but yeah. Like he dumped me, I guess, but he wants to fuck me still. And I let him. I mean, it's easy and I get to sleep in his bed after so it's a win all over."
"Full transparency, I just forgot what I called him. Hard to keep them straight, no pun intended." Crowley reached for the bag on the side table, which was filled with those weird puffed corn snacks Adam liked. They were kind of addictive. He grabbed a handful and held the bag out to Bill, raising his eyebrows. "...so, what's the difference than to when he hadn't dumped you? He doesn't even have to pretend to be nice to you?" Seemed about right. "Damn, you really do find the who's who of human trash. It's bleeding tragic, it is."
Nothing new, but still. "I should bait Felix. Make it sound as if I'm free tonight." Why not troll his friend? "Make sure to remind him that he's turning 25 when you see him later."
"Yeah but I can date other people. I mean... he kinda kills my game but you know, it was good. Like he can date, I can date." Mostly he dated and kept fucking Bill too so really, he was doing well out of the deal and Bill knew that, on some level, but he didn't like living alone or sleeping alone so he always took whatever he could get. He was an easy one to exploit and he knew it - it was why he wasn't lonely.
"Don't torment Felix. He torments himself enough for all of us." Felix was his own worst enemy. As always. "Why do you suddenly have so many kid books? You go out and buy a bunch of 'em or something?" It was nice but a weird change to Crowley's vibes.
"Now, this is nice, isn't it? So many windows, that will make it a nice and cheerful place to work at." Newt's mother was doing her best to cheer him up, knowing that he was anxious about starting to work at yet another place. "It's much less dreary than that office building, all grey. So much more greenery here!"
It was a garden centre, after all. "Let's have a look. Where are you supposed to go?" She walked next to him, glancing over when she saw movement. It was a man changing, putting his uniform shirt on next to his car, a leather jacket and a black shirt draped on the driver's seat.
A snake tattoo was visible on the men's chest and his arm, which drew Newt's mother's attention. Always one to be open-minded, she prodded Newt over it. "That's nice artwork, don't you think?"
Crowley pulled his shirt down, bare eyes because his sunglasses were on the driver's seat while he changed. And said bare eyes looked right at the mother and son duo evidently watching him change. "...hi."
"Hello! It's nice meeting you, young man. My Newt is going to be your new colleague starting today."
Crowley lifted his hand for a little wave. "Cool." What did he even say. "I--" You just saw my nipples. "--usually I change at home, I was just in a rush this morning."
"Mom. Mom. Mom, for God sake, stop staring at the man!" Newt hissed anxiously as he tried to turn his mom away from Crowley, timidly raising his hand in apology. Oh God, he just saw his colleagues nipples and tattoos. Would he actually find a way to get beaten up at work? Would he be the first guy to ever have that happen to him at a fucking garden centre by a workmate?
"Sorry! So sorry, we'll leave you to it. See you later, I suppose." Newt sheepishly tried to cover for himself, wishing his mom wasn't trying to help him. He didn't need help, he could do this, he could get through a six hour shift no problem.
Turning to her, he looked absolutely desperate. "You can go now, mom."
"You have a lovely tattoo, young man. I've been trying to get my Newt to get one, but he's terribly old-fashioned about these things. I read all about how tattoos can help with self-expression and confidence." She was in the know about what body art meant to young people. "All right, Newt, I'll go. Would you be so kind as to show him around? You know how scary a first day can be."
"Yeah. Yeah, sure thing." Crowley reached for his sunglasses and slid them on, closing the car door behind him. What was happening? Was that boy special or something? He didn't even look that young. "Come on then, Newt. Place ain't so bad, apart from some of the customers. Nice meeting you, Mrs."
Crowley said it to her with a bit of a smile and a lot of swagger as he walked closer and, yes, Newt's mother giggled.
"Please leave. I'm actually begging now, mom." People were going to think he was simple and now this ridiculously cool guy was going to be stuck with him and that wasn't fair to anyone! He told her he wanted to go himself but he didn't have a car yet and his mom had to drive him. He was hoping to just hop out of the car but no, this was the hell he was in.
Walking closer to Crowley, he gripped his satchel strap tight and looked nervously at the cool guy with sunglasses and a tattoo.
As his mother finally turned away, he spoke in a quiet voice. "You don't have to do anything, I'm so sorry. She's my ride. We can walk to the door together and then you can pretend this never happened."
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It was starting to get dark, the rain was drizzling and Adam sniffled pathetically as they walked towards the car.
Then, inexplicably, Adam stopped. And, of course, then Crowley did too but Adam was just standing there, still. Despite his uncles insistence that he had to move quickly because of the weather. "I have to pee." Suddenly, urgently. With big, red eyes, he sniffled and held his crotch very obviously. "I gotta pee now!"
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It was bad enough that there was a children's seat in the back now. But pee? No. "Fine. Fine, we'll find you somewhere you can pee."
Crowley sighed as he looked around, frowning. "There's the library, we can go there. Just give me a moment, I'll get our stuff in the car."
He unlocked the car, put the bags in the trunk, and then checked to see whether Adam had peed himself yet. Not yet, small mercies. "Come on, Adam. It's just over there."
He reached for Adam's hand and pulled him along, the rain getting heavier by the second.
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"Oh, I'm terribly sorry, we're closed. It's 18.01." Aziraphale called out from where he was stacking the returned, ready to happily get into a discussion about time keeping when he turned to see a very wet (and ridiculously handsome - like insanely handsome) man and his -- his son? The boy was squirming very insistently.
"I gotta pee, mister!"
"Oh. Oooh." Ah. Well. Maybe the lecture of time keeping could wait. "The bathroom is on the left, the lights are automatic."
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He set the boy down, bent down to help him with his pants and then simply sat him on the toilet, because they had no time to waste here. "Now pee like a champion, kid."
After all the stress he'd caused them. "If that librarian yells at me after, you better look cute for me. Librarians are scary. The one at my school almost bit my nose off."
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When he was finally done, he hopped off the toilet and pulled his undies back up, walking over to the sink and frowning.
"I can't reach, can you help?" Crowley said he had to alwaaaaays wash his hands.
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He'd never found books all that exciting, which he supposed made sense. His eyes weren't made for reading, the strain got to him quickly. Also, reading was for nerds. "Remember to pick a book to show Bill too, he's coming over later."
That said he let go of Adam's hand, giving him a gentle push. "There, you can go over to the train again. Full of books."
Some other kids there, but Crowley wasn't worried about that. Adam was good with other kids. Scarily good, at times, they all seemed to follow his lead entirely too readily.
He glanced around for that shock of light blond curls, wondering whether Aziraphale would be around. He kind of wanted to see him again, because he really wanted to know his deal. Even more so now that he knew where he lived and what that might entail.
Crowley was dressed similarly to last time, although he was wearing a black button up shirt this time, with the top few buttons unbuttoned because he wasn't a square. He noticed some glances he was getting and ignored them. he knew he didn't fit in here, nice library during daytime hours, all black and wearing sunglasses. He simply stood there, arms crossed loosely, daring anyone to take offense. He doubted he'd be getting any grief over it and, hey, his boy was happy to be here.
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And now, here he was. Somehow looking way hotter. Unbuttoned top buttons like that?! A crime! Mortifying. Utterly, truly unfair.
He looked at him and nearly audibly whimpered. What was wrong with him?
And, of course, as he looked at him, Crowley turned and their eyes met. And now he couldn't back off, he couldn't pretend he hadn't seen him or play it cool. So what did he do? With no element of cool, he lifted his hand and waved rather dorkily. "Hello!"
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Sauntering over to the counter, he leaned on it with one hand, looking at Aziraphale closer up. "You didn't give me a warning. I had to read this to him approximately six-hundred sixty-six times. I can now recite it from memory. I see it flash before my eyes in my sleep. My life is nothing but this book. And he wants to keep on reading it."
Crowley propped his chin up on his palm, sighing as he looked at Aziraphale. "Is this torture? Have you concocted this because you like to see me suffer? What kind of sadist are you? Honestly, angel, if there is anything I can give up to stop the torment, I would! Any secret. Any favours. It's all yours. Make him stop wanting to read that damn book and I'm eternally yours."
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He had thought the complaint was real. He had assumed it was for bad conduct or a damaged book or maybe to ask for petrol money but no, it was playful. It was silly. This was 'banter', as it were, and he was able to slow his rapidly beating heart enough to relax a little, smiling somewhat awkwardly. "Yes, well, children do love to hear the same story again and again. The only cure to such an infliction is find another one he would be addicted to. I could recommend you a few, if you'd like, but I'm sure he'll find something today."
He turned and there was young Adam, playing with the children on the train, organising some sort of game.
Aziraphale swallowed down any remaining anxiety and smiled at Crowley. Do not look at his sexy chest, Aziraphale. Do not. That chest is the gateway to hell. "I think he would love Funny Bones."
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He heard Anathema pushing the cart back over and then suddenly, he remembered he wasn't alone in the world and was likely holding his colleague up. That was a big oops on his end.
"You can go on ahead, I will lock up!" Aziraphale called from where he was arranging the true crime books, idly wondering which one Barty would want. "Don't let me keep you, I still have things to do."
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This job would be much better if it wasn't for customers. Alas. "Who was that?! The sexy guy with the tight pants. Redhead. He only had eyes for you."
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What was she implying? Only had eyes for him. Well... today, maybe.. Only eyes for him. And Bill. Whoever the damn hell Bill was.
"His name is Crowley and we met last Friday when his son desperately had to use the facilities. I let him get a book and the rest is history."
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Seemed pretty obvious to her. Softening her approach, she smiled at Aziraphale, taking a step closer. "Do you like him? Did you go out? He calls you angel, doesn't he? That's nice."
And very, very gay.
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Said hell spawn was currently being on his best behaviour, actually, because it was just after time and before bedtime and he was allowed to watch cartoons for a bit. Then he'd be tucked into bed by Bill, which was apparently the best thing ever. Luckily Adam slept early, meant that Bill still had time to go out afterwards. And Crowley could mourn his wasted youth or perhaps something a tad more entertaining.
Looking at Bill, he leaned back on the sofa, deciding it was time to catch up. After all, so far their afternoon had mostly consisted of Bill entertaining Adam while Crowley got to nap on the couch. "You still seeing... whatever his name was. That wanker."
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Bill yawned and looked over one of Adam's Peppa Pig books, just curious more than anything.
"That wanker, that's the name you picked? Christ, that's mild. Usually it's worse." Bill huffed out a laugh and flipped through the pages. "Kinda. I mean, no but yeah. Like he dumped me, I guess, but he wants to fuck me still. And I let him. I mean, it's easy and I get to sleep in his bed after so it's a win all over."
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Nothing new, but still. "I should bait Felix. Make it sound as if I'm free tonight." Why not troll his friend? "Make sure to remind him that he's turning 25 when you see him later."
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"Don't torment Felix. He torments himself enough for all of us." Felix was his own worst enemy. As always. "Why do you suddenly have so many kid books? You go out and buy a bunch of 'em or something?" It was nice but a weird change to Crowley's vibes.
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It was a garden centre, after all. "Let's have a look. Where are you supposed to go?" She walked next to him, glancing over when she saw movement. It was a man changing, putting his uniform shirt on next to his car, a leather jacket and a black shirt draped on the driver's seat.
A snake tattoo was visible on the men's chest and his arm, which drew Newt's mother's attention. Always one to be open-minded, she prodded Newt over it. "That's nice artwork, don't you think?"
Crowley pulled his shirt down, bare eyes because his sunglasses were on the driver's seat while he changed. And said bare eyes looked right at the mother and son duo evidently watching him change. "...hi."
"Hello! It's nice meeting you, young man. My Newt is going to be your new colleague starting today."
Crowley lifted his hand for a little wave. "Cool." What did he even say. "I--" You just saw my nipples. "--usually I change at home, I was just in a rush this morning."
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"Sorry! So sorry, we'll leave you to it. See you later, I suppose." Newt sheepishly tried to cover for himself, wishing his mom wasn't trying to help him. He didn't need help, he could do this, he could get through a six hour shift no problem.
Turning to her, he looked absolutely desperate. "You can go now, mom."
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"Yeah. Yeah, sure thing." Crowley reached for his sunglasses and slid them on, closing the car door behind him. What was happening? Was that boy special or something? He didn't even look that young. "Come on then, Newt. Place ain't so bad, apart from some of the customers. Nice meeting you, Mrs."
Crowley said it to her with a bit of a smile and a lot of swagger as he walked closer and, yes, Newt's mother giggled.
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Walking closer to Crowley, he gripped his satchel strap tight and looked nervously at the cool guy with sunglasses and a tattoo.
As his mother finally turned away, he spoke in a quiet voice. "You don't have to do anything, I'm so sorry. She's my ride. We can walk to the door together and then you can pretend this never happened."
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How is it?
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It's all metaphors.
I barely know what you are trying to say and I KNOW what you are trying to say.
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1/?
2/?
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done
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