use my fancy patter on the telephone

[heavensake]

Comments

[heavensake]

I shouldn't. I have to be careful with that sort of thing. I prefer mini bites of it instead.

I do like Dark. Anything about 70% is heavenly.

And anything below. Most of it. All of it.

Well. No. Not the horrible American stuff. Have you ever tried Hershey's? Did demons happen to invent that one?

[heavenforsake]

I believe you'll find that anything about 70% is hellish instead

it's too much of an indulgence

anyway, if it's food that tastes awful on purpose, there's a better chance of your lot being involved than mine

[heavensake]

Dark doesn't equal evil, you know? Hell can't just call dibs on everything good AND evil.

Heaven isn't all bad taste and blandness, you realise?

After all, I'm as devout as the next man and I have taste.

[heavenforsake]

you do, you do, you do, you do

but

your lot came up with all that anti-masturbation food

[heavensake]

We did not! Humans came up with it and we ... let them. It was worth a shot.

Anything to stop some humans from

Well

You know.

[heavenforsake]

what's the harm in humans masturbating?

wanking, jerking off, touching yourself, jack off

...strangle the snake?

not sure how I feel about that one

[heavensake]

It's a sin and it's just

You know, it's very...

It's an idle waste of time!!

[heavenforsake]

how do you reckon?

from what I gather, it doesn't have to take all that long

seems like low effort, nice pay-off

[heavensake]

Crowley! Please!

I don't wish to discuss this sort of ... shenanigan.

Can we get the subject off such questionable deeds?

What are you doing?

[heavenforsake]

well, not masturbating, rest assured

I'm finishing up an errand, than I was wondering if there's someone who I may tempt into accepting a lunch invite